Reason Number 116

116. I can never find my keys... Where are my keys?

Reason Number 115

115. "I want to kiss your mouthy kitty cat face." Who says stuff like that?

Reason Number 114

114. I talk to myself when I think I'm alone in the apartment.

Reason Number 113

113. Fries should never be borderline sexual.

Reason Number 112

112. How I eat a burrito at Taco Bell may not be what I should be good at.

Reason Number 111

111. I don't care if I win and emasculate men in games.

Reason Number 110

110. Because of my preference for male friends... I am the mayor of "the friend zone."

Reason Number 109

109. I prefer to have male friends.

Reason Number 108

108. I am pretty sure I release a chemical other than Serotonin. Rather than love, people go crazy... Like Bi-polar crazy after they touch me.

Reason Number 107

107. I put food in my teeth to make it look like I'm missing teeth.

Reason Number 106

106. I pretend to dance like I have no rhythm... Then I can't stop.

Reason Number 105

105. I can only lie when drunk.

Reason Number 104

104. I just forgot your name.

Reason Number 103

103. My car only works for one week at a time. then it takes me months to come up with "fix it" money.

Reason Number 102

102. I am plus size.

Reason Number 101

101. When told to dress "festive" I wear a Mötley Crüe tee shirt and put candy canes in my ears, in place of earrings.

Reason Number 100

100. I own footsie pajamas.

Reason Number 99

99. I have a natural bitch face.

Reason Number 98

98. I invite people to events that I later forget about.

Reason Number 97

97. Instead of pretending to understand what someone is saying I stare, blankly, until they explain.

Reason Number 96

96. Pretending to cry to love songs is not that attractive.

Reason Number 95

95. I make up my own words to songs... And they are not rad.

Reason Number 94

94. I can play.. Well, I do play my suspenders as an instrument.

*There was a video of this but the girl who took it never gave it to me. Bummer.

Reason Number 93

93. "I'm hot for cognitive dissonance!" (who says stuff like that?)

Reason Number 92

Talking about ball climate is not good small talk.

Reason Number 91

91. I have people smell my sweaty armpits.

Reason Number 90

90. I'm an asshole.

Reason Number 89

89. I want to "pour Silk Nog all over my body and dance naked in the moonlight."

Reason Number 88

88. I am far too excited about potatoes.

Reason Number 87

87. I can stick my fist in my mouth.. And I'll get the whole group of people I'm with to try it themselves.

Reason Number 86

86. My people's dance. Don't know what that is? I'll probably show you... In public.

Reason Number 85

85. "I'll drink anything."(Maybe not what I should say out loud.)

Reason Number 84

84. "Bob & Weave!"(This is how I get to the bar to order a drink, in a crowded Hollywood bar.)

Reason Number 83

83. I will yell the most inappropriate thing... As soon as the music stops.

Reason Number 82

82. I ogle pie that other people eat... Because I don't eat pie.

Reason Number 81

81. I get noticeably uncomfortable if someone watches me apply chapstick. The result... Not pretty.

Reason Number 80

80. I want my areolas taken off, shaped into stars and put back on.

Reason Number 79

79. I play with my nose ring and it looks like I'm picking my nose.

Reason Number 78

78. I don't know when it's a date... What's a date?

Reason Number 77

77. When I like someone I tend to act like a dog waiting for it's owner to throw the stick.

Reason Number 76

76. I pretend to break beer bottles over my head call dudes to fight.

Reason Number 75

75. My friends have favorite entries in "the book."

Reason Number 74

74. My "cat in heat" impression.

Reason Number 73

73. I have made it to number 73.

Reason Number 72

72. I will scream in the face of men " Why would you think I'm intimidating?!"

Reason Number 71

71. I scare people.

Reason Number 70

70. I will fight my waitress for the glass so I can get the last sip.

Reason Number 69

69. Huh huh... 69.
(Yes, I couldn't think of anything because of the number 69. I have the humor of a 12 year old boy.)

Reason Number 68

68. Drool. Yes... Sometimes I drool.

Reason Number 67

67. Other people started writing them down for me.

Reason Number 66

66. The company I keep.

Reason Number 65

65. I tell people to use condiments during sex.

Reason Number 64

64. When I'm drinking I can't even spell akward.

Reason Number 63

63. I try and hit on someone and it ends in a minimum of 5 spilled drinks.

Reason Number 62

62. I become instantly impaired when I hear an accent.

Reason Number 61

61. I make sexual innuendos and not on purpose.

Reason Number 60

60. Men are starting to point out what I need to write in "the book."

Reason Number 59

59. I sexually harass police officers.

Reason Number 58

58. My Jabba The Hut impersonation.

Reason Number 57

57. I don't quite know the difference between picking up guys... And picking up guys... literally.

Reason Number 56

56. I ramble when nervous.

Reason Number 55

55. I will lick a bald man's head... And enjoy it.

Reason Number 54

54. I don't back down from a dare.

Reason Number 53

53. I shouldn't talk about what pee smells like.

Reason Number 52

52. I accuse people of staring at my boobs.

Reason Number 51

51. Can you tell me when to back off?

Reasons Number 50

50. I blame other people when I spill on myself.

Reason Number 49

49. I want to present my finger mustache during sex.

Reason Number 48

48. I have a theory on " Ass Men" VS "Breast Men."

Reason Number47

47. I ask every man in my path if they are an "Ass Man" or a "Breast Man."

Reason Number 46

46. I tease boys when I think they are cute.

Reason Number 45

45. I am terrified of bunnies.

Reason Number 44

44. I try and challenge most men to an air hockey game.

Reason Number 43

43. I'll slap my ass and yell "Clydesdale!" in public.